March, 2016 – Negative People
By Dr. Bonnie Lyon
Do you have a negative thinker in your life? Negative people can be difficult to have a relate to at home and in the workplace. Here’s how to identify them and how to deal with them.
The Characteristics of Negative Thinkers:
- Make gross assumptions
- Attempt to mind-read other people
- Have a fierce need to always be “right”
- Are rigid and inflexible
- Focus on the worse possible outcomes
- Blame others for how they feel
- Focus on problems rather than solutions
- Are grumpy
- Are people other people avoid
Negative thinkers are people that others can’t stand and will avoid for their own peace of mind. Negative people are difficult people. People who don’t do what you want them to do, who purposely do what you don’t want them to do. They don’t care to listen to you. They are defensive to your conversations and suggestions. These people are stuck in their past who project their “unpacked baggage” onto others and a who do not agree with them or affirm their victim mentality.
How to deal with negative people?
Sadly, you cannot change a difficult person; however, you can change how you communicate with them in such a way that they are influenced to change themselves.
- Kill them with kindness.
- Practice active listening; just nod and smile.
- Keep interactions short.
- Offer palliative responses: “I’m sorry you are going through this.”
- Have a prepared exit plan when the negativity gets too high.
- Be busy when a negative person comes your way. Refuse to engage.
- Refuse to let negativity become “catchy.” Go high whenever they go low.
For help with a difficult person in your life call Dr. Bonnie!